Story time. Gather 'round.

McKey (the brown-haired one) won America's Next Top Model the other night.  Out of the three finalists, she was my favorite.  She just has that high-fashion/runway look that they other two girls just didn't quite have.  After 11 seasons (or cycles, as Tyra prefers them to be called), I think the show is starting to get a little flat...  I mean, there are only so many ridiculous photo shoots they can come up with.

In other Tyra news, Robert Pattinson made a surprise appearance on her show and gave Tyra something that every teenage girl and like 12% of men want: a bite on the neck.  Lucky bitch.

Julianne Hough may be putting away her dancing shoes forever, or at least for the next season of Dancing With The Stars.  She's going to focus more on her "music career."  Hm.  In this interview, she also predicts that her brother Derek and partner Brooke Burke will be the champions of this season.  I may have to agree...

It's about time!  The most successful American Idol champ, Kelly Clarkson, is working on a new album, and the first single may be released soon!  I hope it's good.

Just a few updates...

Guess who's hosting the CMA's this year?  Country "singers" Julianne Hough, Kellie Pickler, and Taylor Swift.  Interesting choices, eh?  Hmmmm...  I think Julianne Hough has taken this reality TV thing too far; I mean, stick to one genre, ok?  Anyhow, I won't be watching, but it's newsworthy I suppose.

Work, Tyra!  Everyone's favorite hot tranny mess is the top earning female in primetime TV. Wow.  Last year she made $23 million.  Wow!  That's such a ridiculous amount of money for sitting on a couch gossiping (and groping) B-list celebrities and telling girls they are too ugly/unmotivated to be a model.  Ha.  

Why am I being so cynical today?  I'm not sure.  

Here's something to remove the cynicism...  It looks like this time it might be for real...  Have you seen it?  Secret video footage of a Britney rehearsal, possibly (hopefully!) for the VMA's which air tomorrow night.  My fingers are crossed...

ANTM Judge Quits

It comes as no surprise to me that Twiggy has decided to leave ANTM. Whatever, she was pretty forgettable as a judge. I mean, who could compare to Miss J, Tyra, or NIGEL BARKER? Let's be honest. Maybe Twiggy has plans to start her own model-search show? I wouldn't be shocked.

They're replacing her with some 80's supermodel that I've never heard of. I guess I wasn't paying that much attention to fashion when I was that young... But that's no surprise, either, especially to those of you who remember some of the outfits I came up with as a gay youth. Hideous.

Some favorites from the vaults...

I thought I'd share a little background of my experiences with reality TV. In other words, here are some of my favorite moments with a bit of explanation...

Project Runway singlehandedly brought Bravo into the reality spotlight. The show takes a handful of designers to New York City and gives them challenges to create various pieces of fashion, all the while eliminating a designer each week. The finale takes place at Fashion Week, where the top three designers showcase an entire collection of clothing. There are always incredible characters on the show; artistic people are known to be--how can I say this gently--a little insane. Santino from season *two was no exception, and he was able to make up for being such a dick by doing an awesome impression of Tim Gunn. I think most of the designers on that season shared my sentiments, as they all join in on the laughter.

Another wildly popular reality show giving a fashion-hopeful the chance of a lifetime is America's Next Top Model, produced, hosted, and judged by the unpredictable Tyra Banks. Each week, the models have photo shoots and are critiqued by some of the biggest names in the business, concluding with the elimination of the one who didn't give enough face, skipped out on a challenge, had ugly skin, or just wasn't fierce enough. At the eliminations, Tyra is always acting her FACE off, often lecturing the girls about why they are going home and why they should probably just give up on their hopes and dreams altogether. During cycle four Tyra really hit the wall, totally GOING OFF on Tiffany upon her elimination (the only double-elimination ever on the show). It's one of those moments where you are watching the TV and thinking, "What is going on?" Tyra is insane. It's all in the clip.

One of my favorite reality shows of all time is American Idol, duh. I have vivid memories of watching the first season with a few of my friends in someone's basement, sipping stolen alcohol out of empty shampoo bottles (don't ask). Though there have been some obvious duds (Ruben Studdard, namely), Idol has produced some fierce champions, but many of my favorites haven't even been in the finales... Check out Jennifer Hudson singing "Weekend in New England" from Barry Manilow night on season three. It's insane, and she looks insane, too. And here's Latoya London, one of my all time favorite contestants, singing "Don't Rain on My Parade" from Big Band night (again from season three, the best season EVER!). Idol was probably the first show to really give its losers a chance in the spotlight, especially William Hung and his awesome rendition of "She Bangs." Want more Idol? Just go to YouTube and search--you'll find years worth of clips, both good and bad.

Some reality shows only have a small following, but this doesn't mean that they don't provide incredible entertainment. A perfect example is Trading Spouses, a show that I've tried to watch since it's inception. Without question, the absolute best "trade" was when The God Warrior spent a week with a Pagan family. Check out her reaction upon her homecoming. It turns me into a God-fearing man, I'll say that.

More to come...