Just a quickie...

I know it's not technically reality TV, but I was looking over TIME's list of the 10 Most Awkward Moments of 2007 and this clip from The View is really something. I remember hearing about it shortly after it happened, but this 5 minute fight between Rosie and Elizabeth is a must-watch. What do you think? Should Rosie have just shut up? Is Elizabeth a crazy bitch?

Some Sunday Tidbits...

Not only is Jessica Sierra from American Idol in jail right now, but she is also getting ready to star on VH1's Celebrity Rehab or something. OH YEAH, she's pregnant, too.

Holly Madison turned 28 yesterday. Hef's Number One is my favorite, too. She's fierce.

This is pretty funny, actually. Bret Michael's show Rock Of Love's second season is coming soon, and three of the potential girlfriends are transexuals.

Katharine McPhee is in a movie! This is news to me... I probably won't see it, mostly because Rumer Willis is in it and I think she's the biggest joke on the planet.

I haven't heard any of the tracks yet, but Blake Lewis (runner-up on American Idol last season) has put out a CD. Read his interview with AmericanIdol.com! His album is at #32 on the Billboard Chart this week; last week it was at #10. He's so cute, too.

Yessss!! So You Think You Can Dance? auditions are beginning January 17! If you're a fierce dancer, please audition. This is one of my favorite shows of all time.

A Shot At Love: The Final Round was on recently, and it is a joke. It turns out that "Little Italy" himself, Dominico, is going to have his own show on MTV. It's called That's Amore. Typical. Spin-offs of dating shows have really become popular lately... Tila looks absolutely ridiculous on the show--a tiny gold dress and a new haircut. Dani is still a fierce firefighter. Bobby and Tila couldn't see one another for two months. AND Tila makes a big announcement:

I Love New York 2 Finale

Upon visiting a plantation in Jamaica with Buddha, New York exclaims, "This is the 21st century.  I don't need to be pickin' no cotton."  Then, after riding a horse across a river, her relief is expressed because, "it just felt so good to be back on earth...  Or land..."  Amazing.

I am just now watching the finale episode and so far it's knocking my socks off.  Is New York ever sober?  Has Taylor Made ever lived a day without visiting a tanning bed?  Is muscle-bound Buddha completely terrified of Sister Patterson?  No.  No.  Yes.

In the end, she chooses Taylor Made.  Buddha is not trustworthy enough for New York, and Sister P HATES him.  Taylor Made is a complete loser, but whatever.  I don't think they will last too long and I'm quite surprised that there aren't any headlines about them right now...  Oh well.

A Couple of Updates...

American Idol season two winner Ruben Studdard (I hoped I would never have to write about him) has been dropped by his record label. That sucks, you know? Maybe he will have to do some commercials in his home town like Melinda Doolittle did...

Also in Idol news, the ever-trashy Jessica Sierra has put out a sex tape! I won't be watching it, and I don't think Perez will be either...

Even more Idol news! Page Six is reporting that Fantasia is pregnant! She's had her understudy go on for her in The Color Purple on Broadway sooo many times lately; maybe it's because she's with child.

One more Idol tidbit. Simon Cowell has lost some weight apparently. He looks kind of good...??!!??

VH1 is bringing Bret Michaels back for another season of Rock Of Love. Personally, I don't really care because I don't know who he is and I have never watched an episode of that show before.

Heidi Montag is on the cover of USWeekly confirming that she and Spencer are NOT getting married. Apparently the ring wasn't her "dream ring" or something stupid like that. I mean, here's the thing--Heidi is never going to find someone more perfect for her than Spencer.

Tila Tequila picked the boy. That's dumb because she already has a boyfriend! She should have chosen Dani because she's cuter and would be more fun to add to her existing relationship. Do I smell a spin-off featuring Dani to come in 2008?

Project Runway quotes... (etc.)

I missed last week's episode because I was working, but I made it home in time to see tonight's Project Runway, and I'm glad I did.  The previews made it out to be much more dramatic than it really was; I mean, I thought Jack was like super sick or something.  Turns out he (just) has an infection that makes his upper lip look crazy.  It was sad to see him leave, though, because I think he was definitely one of the best designers on the show.  

As I was watching, I was trying to think of some good ways to summarize the show, and I decided that a collection of great quotes would be the best route to take tonight.  So here goes.

Tim Gunn: "...'cause I've made more bad decisions at 3 AM than I can list."

He's soooo funny slash gay sometimes.  Loves it.

Christian: "Don't these bitches know that I am way better than them?"

So unabashedly modest...  But completely amazing.  I love him.

Stephen: "Dear God, help me now."

In response to finding out he had to use a sick wedding dress in the challenge.

Christian: "It looks God-awful hideous."

Elisa: "Underneath this new body she has a new sexuality."

WTF???  She is too crazy.

Michael Kors: "...it's a little Shirley Mclaine when she played a hooker with a heart of gold."

Those were the best quotes of the night.  A few other observations:

*Stephen is a big nerd.  Too bad he went home...  He lives above one of my friends here in Chicago.

*Christian is amazing.  

*There's really no reason that they brought Chris back.  Sorry.

In other news, Bravo's new show Make Me A Supermodel premiers in January, hosted by Tyson Beckford and Nikki Taylor.  It could be amazing.  I'm hoping for the best...

Crowned with Thorns

Crowned, the new show which premiered on The CW after Top Model tonight is a thorn in my side.  It's horrible.  And not that funny, trashy, "I can't wait 'till next week" kind of horrible.  It's just bad.  First of all, the music is ridiculous.  Second, there are WAY too many tears.  Third, I just don't really get it.  They're not models, they're not pageant girls, and they're not interesting.  What's the point?  

Final Thought: I missed the Top Model finale, but I hear that Saleisha won.  You know, the one with that ugly-ass bob.  Her hair reminds me of the Beatles!

Sunday Night is for Reality TV!

Sooo much happened tonight! After watching The Hillz special, I caught MTV just in time for I Love New York 2. It was a turbulent episode in which the final four contestants' families came to the house to meet New York. Well, it was a fiasco, especially between Sister Patterson and Entertainer's mother. At the first dinner, Sister P was completely stoned, barely able to shake anyone's hand or say more than "hello." What a joke! Then, at a later dinner (cooked by New York [you couldn't pay me to eat that]), Sister P really went off to Entertainer's mother, proclaiming that her hair "look like [she's] wearin’ a beaver’s ass on [her] head." Completely funny, completely rude, yet completely true. At the end of the show, Entertainer was sent home. Not shocking. At this point, I have a feeling she'll pick Buddha.

Next, I tuned in to E! for the season premier of The Girls Next Door. I love that show, seriously. I think I would be a great addition to that house, too; all of those girls are SO fierce and SO funny. It was basically the same shenanigans for the girls, complete with a 4th of July send-off celebration for a bunch of Marines.

E! knew that people would tune in for Girls, so directly after it was the series premier of Snoop Dogg's Father Hood. I predicted that it would be bad, but I really had no idea. My friend Libby told me via text message that she's sick of seeing "spoiled rich kids" on TV, but I'm not. However, these kids aren't that cool and Snoop is not that important to the pop culture scene anymore. Anyhow, there were three good things about the show: 1. Snoop's daughter who is totally cute; 2. Snoop vacuuming the house; and 3. a preview of the season including a phone call from David Beckham. I sincerely hope that Snoop and Becks don't become friends; I really can't see Posh letting that happen, though.

Final Thought: America's Most Smartest Model is down to two contestants: Andre and VJ. VJ is sooo much hotter and Andre is an idiot, but who knows who will win... I'm over that show.

The Hillz are alive with the sound of Lauren

I missed the original airing of Lauren Looks Back, since it's MTV, I am catching the rerun a couple hours later. It's a pretty awesome clip/review show, catching up those of us who have missed a single episode of Laguna Beach or The Hillz. I've taken a few pages of notes, but I'll consolidate it all to one sentence per segment. Well, maybe two sentences. And a quote.

1. It's all about Stephen, but he's too busy with Kristin to really take Lauren seriously. Stephen!

2. Stephen is a huge man-whore, completely "not available" for Lauren. Prom and graduation bring an end to high school, but Lauren only survives design school in San Fran for one semester.

3. Enter Jason, complete with that ugly girlfriend of his, Jessica. Also, enter Heidi, who walked with Kristin in a fashion show (a sign of things to come?).

4. Lauren and Heidi move in together and, miraculously, Lauren scores the internship at Teen Vogue and meets Whitney (my fave!). As she says, she "came to Los Angeles to take chances!"

5. Lauren and Jason have all kinds of problems, including a SUPER dramatic scene on New Year's Eve. Then, Lauren makes the biggest mistake EVER by becoming, as Lisa Love says, "the girl who didn't go to Paris."

6. Lauren, already being SO trendy with dark fingernail polish, realizes she can "never be normal" with Jason. Spencer and Brody are brought to the forefront, and Heidi and her loser BF hook up slutty Jen with Brody at a party.

7. Basically, Spencer is an idiot ("He is a sucky person!" / Brody & Spencer break up!). Jason gets out of rehab and, after being super nice to Lauren, she finds out that he's engaged to some not-so-cute tennis player.

8. It's all about Brody. Heidi is around, but she's still a bitch.

Keeping Up With Kardashian Backgrounds

So I'm watching a mini-marathon of Keeping Up With The Kardashians and I've come up with a question: why are they famous?  I've decided to do some research.  Some of my findings confirmed little tidbits I had heard, but a few things were completely new to me.

The late Robert Kardashian, the patriarch of the family, was an attorney in the OJ Simpson murder trial.  He passed away in September 2003.

Bruce Jenner, now married to Kris (the mother), is an Olympic gold medalist, having won the decathalon in the 1976 summer games.  He was also in some horrible disco movie about The Village People.  Oh, this is not his first appearance on reality TV, either: he was on Dancing With The Stars as well as the short-lived Skating With Celebrities, a show I would be SO fierce on.

Kim Kardashian was married to Damon Thomas, a music producer, but is better known for her sex tape with R&B "star" Ray-J (isn't he Brandy's brother?).  I haven't seen the sex tape (yet), but I can't imagine it could compare to Pam & Tommy's.  

Brody Jenner, Bruce's son, has made the rounds and successfully crossed-over between reality shows, a feat that only a few have conquered, having dated Kristin Cavallari from Laguna Beach who I absolutely HATE.  He's also really hot.

Here's a quote that scared me when I heard it and rightfully so (in an hour, the Jenners' young daughters were mocking the Girls Gone Wild shoot on a stripper pole in the basement): "Brody, you're in charge."  Maybe leaving two eight year old girls at home with Brody isn't a great idea...  I don't think it would be a good idea to leave him at home with me, either...

Friday Findings

Another slightly gay-slanted Reality TV blog is reporting something that I find to be a little ridiculous...  Jack Mackenroth, everyone's favorite fruity beefcake on Project Runway, is dating Dale Levitski, the mowhawk-clad runner-up from Top Chef's third season.  Am I the only one who thinks it's kind of a joke?  I mean, they're both definitely good looking guys, but after watching both of them regularly on their respective shows, I can't really see there being much romantic chemistry.  I can definitely picture them going out in Boystown and having a fab night together, but let's face it, their personalities don't really work together in a "dating" sort of way.  But maybe I'm just jealous.  Incredibly jealous.  Oh, PS--the two apparently "met over Myspace."  I've done that before and, well, I'll just leave it at that.

In other Bravo TV news, studio execs have announced that two shows I've never really watched (Shear Genius and Top Design) are both being slated for second seasons.  I'm indifferent.

I'm planning on catching up on some shows tonight through Sunday, so expect some fierce updates.  I hope my readership didn't go down while I was vacationing in the South of Indiana--hahaha.